I recently attended a funeral. It was for the wife of a great family friend. I am always stirred at funerals because of my dad passing away 10 years ago. It is even worse when someone passes away that knew him. I am a full believer in taking every opportunity to gain some insights of wisdom even from a funeral. Funerals give you the chance to see how someone lived out their life and gives an example of how to live yours. It is also a time of reflecting, as you listen to stories of how this person made their mark in life. This particular lady was Nan Weaver. Her husband, Jimmy Weaver has worked for my family for close to 20 years and continues to be a very close friend. What a great woman, mom and friend she was to my family.
As I listened to her family speak, I sat in my seat reflecting and shedding a tear as I realized that we must live each moment to the fullest. Knowing that one day we all will pass away and that, I too, will have a funeral and celebration of my life. Her son, Daniel, talked about how he and his siblings remembered their mom. It was so real and relatable as he made us laugh and then made us cry as they remembered his mother. I then reflected on my life and examined the ways I want to be remembered. Just as Nan’s children called her a ‘prayer warrior’ and a mom who was always there for them, I too want my children to say the same thing about me. It made me realize that I have got to get busy living this life. I can many times get so wrapped up in trivial things that I forget the most important things in my life. I made a promise to myself as I sat in the pew to let things go and not to hold on to grudges. I vowed to give my full attention to the ones that surround me and not be so busy that I miss the most important moments in my life. And finally, I vow to live each day to the fullest with no regrets. I want to be remembered as someone who gave back to others and was a great mom, wife, daughter, friend and mentor.
I would like to encourage you today to live each day as if it were your last. Don’t dwell on things you can’t change but focus on the things you can change. I leave you with a question to ask yourself, “What do you want people say about you at your funeral?” For Nan,it was a legacy of joy and family love. Comment and let me know what you want your legacy to be.
Chantell,
Very inspirational words. I turn 47 tomorrow and have probably reflected more on my life in the last several years than I ever have. Becoming a Dad in 2007 truly made me realize what the most important things in life are. I have been truly blessed with a wonderful wife, son, and daughter. While working full time and being a full time student take up a great deal of my time, I still make time for them. Some days it may be letting them come lay down in the bed with me after dinner. Working nights, I usually try to catch about a two hour nap on most nights. The kids come in and lay down with me and watch TV or play games on my phone while I’m asleep. While a lot of people may not think that is a big deal, to me it is. That is one of the things they will remember for the rest of their lives. They may not remember what they got for Christmas or a birthday one year, but they will remember that they got to lay down with Daddy before he went to work. They will remember the bedtime stories along with the hugs, kisses, fist-bumps, and high fives.
My wife is also a student at CSU (BS Homeland Security) and some weeks our “date nights” consist of taking our laptops into the living room and working on homework together and talking about a little bit of everything. We watch shows we have missed during the week and enjoy being together. She may not remember a bouquet of flowers from me on a certain day, but she will remember our “date nights”.
I have learned to take advantage of the time I have because I know we are all on “borrowed time” and we can never turn back time. I do not want to look back on my life and always wish “I had….” I want to look back and say “I’m glad I did”. No regrets.
And to conclude…I never leave the house without telling them that I love them, even if they are asleep. I give them a kiss and tell them I love them. They may not hear the words or feel the kiss, but I do.